Sandbagging 101

Unemployment has it's benefits. The surplus of ride time to ensure what passes for fitness in the confines of the Wombat room has paid off in victory, sweet victory for this pround member of bIKE cLUB.

Saturday found this correspondent within the confines of Bear Creek Lake Park for the annual Battle of the Bear. This particular course is perfect for the larger mammals such as the Albino Sasquatch as the four mile lap has less than 300 feet of climbing. Otherwise, it is flat or downhill mix of fast, non technical single and doubletrack.

Due to the beauracratic wisdom of NORBA, one day licences are not availible to expert class racers. Sport class one day licences are only $5, one tenth of the cost of an annual licence and more than enough for one of two NORBA races I will be participating in this year.(Firecracker 50, July 4th, sign up soon!)

The 30-39 Sport mens Cross Country started 2 minutes after the 20-29 class under an unusually HOT mid spring day. Although there wasn't a neutral feed for water, the race organizers had a 10 year old boy in charge of a hose and spray nozzle to soak the riders as they came through the start/finish area. This particular child was suffering from ADD of some sort as he managed to miss one particular large rider decked out in orange team colors not once but twice.

The race was uneventful as any suspense as to who would win was eliminated early in the third lap as the leader at the time crashed at the crest of the first of three short climbs with the second place rider, yours truly, right on his wheel. Any answer to the rhetorical question "Are you OK?" was drowned out by the thought of " dumbass. " The gap continued to to expand with the goal of trying catch and pass all the members of the age group that started two minutes earlier. The winner of that age group is the only one to avoid that humiliation.

Please refrain from offering congratulatory calls and gifts as this was a hollow victory. As I already have the FARVA for "Rider of the year", the plastic plaque and Chipolte gift certificate are more than enough recognition. The summer awaits with multiple opportunies to embarass and humiliate myself in an assortment of Cat 3 road races and Expert class racing at the Winter Park series as well as a wedding on July 30.

Word on the street is that bIKE cLUB member Highroller intiated his race season at the "Wheels of Thunder", we anxiously await the report.